Today, Matt’s trial comes to a close. And he returns home from Oakland for good. Then life will slow for us, just a little bit, which I hope will let me catch my breath.

Because I would like to get back to work. Writing. Really writing. But with his hours, I struggle to find a balance between my personal and professional life.

One of my girlfriends, who is also an attorney, came over on Monday night with her son. “Most of the men I work with have wives who stay home,” she said. She jostled her baby on her hip. “The job almost demands it.” Because there are so few hours left at the end of the week to take care of household chores.

It made me think of the women like her who don’t have a spouse who stays home, and what it must be like to work that second shift when you walk through the door. Where do they catch their breath?

Or, when you both work, is parenting shared more equally? Is housework? What do you think?

Without Matt here, I’ve been catering to our kids’ taste buds. Because the joy for me comes from sharing in a meal. Last night, we made Egg Fried Rice to use up the last of this week’s CSA box, spring onions and carrots.

Egg Fried Rice, adapted from my son’s preschool:

• 4 cups cooked rice
• 2 egg
• 1 tablespoon oil
• 2 scallions, chopped
• 1 tablespoon garlic
• 1 carrot, chopped
• 1/2 cup frozen peas, thawed in water
• 4 slices cooked bacon, cut into pieces
• 2 tablespoons soy sauce

Beat eggs. Stir fry the cooked bacon, scallions, garlic, carrots and frozen peas in oil. Then, add rice one cup at a time.

Add eggs and stir continuously until the eggs are done. Add soy sauce before serving.

This post is a part of Real Food Wednesday.

Today Matt returns home from Oakland, after 4 1/2 weeks at trial. We’re excited to see him. Our 5-year-old has set out his newly lost tooth to show his dad while our 3-year-old practices his tackles against my legs. And I’ve made an appointment at a salon because his re-entry point into our family trips us up every time.

And so today we’ll decompress before we come together. What this past four weeks has taught me is that I can do it alone, but I don’t want to.

So while he takes our three children to breakfast, I’ll sit beneath a dryer with my hair in foils, reading a magazine, and drinking a cup of Caribou coffee. I want to feel whole again. Starting with my hair.

We’re in my hometown of Ithaca for three weeks because Matt’s in Oakland for four. He’s got a trial there starting next week, and right now he’s hunkered down in a conference room, ordering meals in. And while he works, we play.

And I used to feel guilty about that, thinking my time would be better spent being efficient, until our priest spoke about the importance of play. He said it’s through play that you celebrate life, that you honor it. Because it is through play you become an active participant in your life.

Because life isn’t about the drudgery or the passivity of a repetitive task; it’s about curiosity. God gives each of us gifts. And it’s through play we discover what they are.

By building tunnels. By learning how to play an instrument. By reading a book.

Play leads us to our passions. Which are what keep us alive in spite of it all.

What have you discovered about yourself through play?