Last night, we made Advent wreaths at our church. We’ve been trying to become more involved in the community there. Because our children are at the age where we need teach them what we believe in, what our family stands for, while we still have their attention. But they’ve got questions we can’t answer: Why do you light the purple candles first? What is the pink candle for? What happens when you light the last one? Does that make Jesus rise from the dead?

And religion today feels different than it did when I was growing up, attending a Catholic school, where all lessons were black and white. How do you teach when you believe in a gray area that the institution you support doesn’t?

How do you teach religion in your home?

***

For this meatloaf recipe, we used our leftover croutons (you could do bread crumbs as well). The kids devoured it, eating about a half pound of meat each.

Man, I thought diapers were expensive. They’re nothing compared to appetites. For all things.

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The sports. Where do I start? When I was growing up, I played all sorts of sports: soccer, hockey, softball, and even lacrosse, before it became popular for girls. Today it seems you don’t experiment; you specialize. I’ve been trying to resist it, to let our children explore. But then you see that flicker of talent and you ask yourself: What if? What if I miss this opportunity? What if they do? It’s hard not to confuse your dreams with theirs.

***

No recipe to recommend tonight. I screwed up this ribs recipe (short on time, I opted to broil, which left the ribs too tough to chew). So we stared at the ribs while eating rice and roasted broccoli. (Our dog, however, loved them.)

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We strung our Christmas lights yesterday, and lit our first fire of the season. As we listened to the wood crackle, our kids danced around the living room.

It’s hard to believe that Matt and I are approaching our 10th anniversary, that our children have grown up enough that we can have an actual conversation again. We find ourselves with the energy to do the things we’ve been intending to do for years now, like start traditions, ways for our kids to remember us, to remember our family, when the first snow falls.

When I interviewed food bloggers about their favorite Christmas holiday recipes, what struck me was how much a familiar smell invoked a memory for them. A Thanksgiving menu is easy. But Christmas? The possibilities feel endless.

***

I’m into ways to use up ground beef. It keeps well in the fridge, and it’s a less expensive meat. This Serbian Ground Beef, which we made tonight, finds its way to our table often. Another great way to use up your leftover veggies.

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Our boys found a wooly bear caterpillar rolled up in our alcove today. The caterpillar, I think, was preparing to hibernate, but our boys had other plans. They built a cage for it using my water pitcher, fetching sticks and grass from our backyard. Our almost 3-year-old daughter, ever helpful, flung handfuls of dirt in, and they cried out. But I was glad to see them play outdoors for so long, their heads bent together. When I was growing up, I roamed free, splashed in our neighborhood creek, and fell in love with nature. I don’t know how our children will learn to appreciate the solitude nature brings when they have so few opportunities to explore it today without an adult by their side. But maybe that will change as they grow older.

***

There are certain foods that are pretty forgiving, meaning you can hide what’s left over in your fridge in them, and neither your children nor your husband will notice. Namely enchiladas, tacos, soups, meatloaf and lasagna, which is what I made using our leftover turkey tonight. I substituted the Parmesan cheese (which we rarely have) with cheddar. And I like that this lasagna uses sour cream, which we usually stock in our fridge, rather than ricotta. I never think to buy that.

How do you use up leftover food?

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We finally got an offer on our home, a low one, but it’s negotiable enough. And now it has sparked a debate between us: where now? Where do we move while we wait for our home to be built? Or perhaps the better question is, what defines you? Is it your home, or your neighborhood?

For me, it is our neighborhood. Where my friends are. Where our children play with friends they’ll eventually be classmates with and I know who to call when a day has become long and hard. I can’t stand the thought of moving away from it all. Not for six months. Or not for my greater fear, two years, if our project gets delayed.

But for Matt, it is both. He is more willing to commute to live in a home in which he is comfortable. A house that feels like a home, that has space for us to move and breath, places for our children to play.

Which is more important to you?

***

Tonight, I made a casserole with our leftover hot chili. I placed it in a baking dish, and poured this cornbread recipe over it. I substituted 1/2 cup of butter for the vegetable oil (how does a cook run out of vegetable oil?) and raised the baking time to 45 minutes.

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In my first article for More.com, “Renew Your Spirit,” I wrote about how one catalyst started each woman’s reinvention. When you’re at home, sometimes it feels the professional world moves ahead of you; you’re two steps behind it. And you need to figure out how to catch up.

What I had lost while at home wasn’t so much my ability but my confidence. So, like Zoe Francois, I took a class. It was through MediaBistro.com, and having my articles critiqued by a professional writer gave me the confidence to pitch editors again. And not take failure personally.

Have you lost your confidence?

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While we’ve all taken time off to be at home with our children, we’re now planning to relaunch as freelance writers. Only when you’ve been home for seven years like me, you lose touch with the outside world. Specifically, your connections. We know networking is everything. So the three of us decided to start our own writers’ network. Because sometimes it’s not about the powerful people you know, but the people who make you feel powerful.

Don’t know how to start your network to get your reinvention underway? Here are some tips.

1. Join social media. Find others in your community who share your interests.
2. Reconnect with professionals from your previous life through social media. Every six months or so, meet in person for coffee.
3. Trust in other moms. Chances are they are wondering, “What next?” just like you. Ask what interests them, and share what interests you. They may introduce you to a mentor or a new friend.
4. When you meet up, make it a point not to talk about your kids. At least not all of the time. This is your time to focus on you.

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Summer is crazy, I’ve decided. It’s hot and humid, but I love it: days at the park or beach, nights on friends’ decks. But it gets stressful, too, because with school out, it’s hard to find time to myself.

I’ve been writing for More.com and I’m interested now in reinventing yourself while at home. I loved Katy Read‘s article for Salon about the price you pay when you stay at home with children. And while I haven’t regretted my decision or my time here, I do wonder what its long-term impact could be. Because when I quit working I always thought I could waltz back into the workforce. But with the economy as it is, many remain jobless. What are your thoughts?

***

We’re making Asian Orange Chicken tonight. I’ve been craving sweets lately. Rather than denying myself the taste of sugar, I’m pairing it with something that is healthy–like chicken.

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It’s summer, and although our days are slow, our dinners feel rushed. We run late at the pool; we run late at the park, and when we walk through the door, our kids are famished. So we stock our pantry and refrigerator for a few dishes we can prepare in a snap. One is bacon spaghetti. It’s greasy, but delicious. Roasted broccoli is an easy side.

I’ve been blogging less, and writing more, feeling inspired by the women I profile for More.com. I don’t know about you, but it took me time to find myself after our children were born. And I was glad to be lost for awhile.

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We invited some friends over for Memorial Day, and they asked what they could bring. I’m never sure how to answer that question.

Growing up on the East Coast, I don’t remember bringing a dish to share for a dinner — unless it was a potluck. And as a host I felt it was my job to provide.

But here, in the Midwest, bringing a dish seems part of the culture of pitching in. And today I’m thankful for it. Because Matt was in Israel for work all week, so I’m a bit burned out.

For this barbecue I simply picked up marinated lamb and steak kabobs at our neighborhood grocery store. And I’m guessing I won’t be the only one looking forward to a Mint Julep.

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